In a scary movie when the audience knows that a killer is in the house, but the owners in the house don't know it.

At a restaurant there is a fly floating in a customer's soup and the customer says, "Mmmmm. Insect soup, my favorite!"

When watching a talk show, the audience knows why a person has been brought on the show. However, the person sitting in the chair does not know that he is going to be reunited with a former lover.

You break a date with your girlfriend so you can go to the ball game with the guys. When you go out to the concession stand, you run into your date who is there with another guy.

You stay up all night studying for a test. When you go to class, you discover the test is not until the next day.

You are arguing with your mother, who reprimands you for being "smart." Your reply is sarcastic, "If you think I am smart, then why won't you let me make some smart decisions?"

Your boyfriend shows up in ripped jeans and a stained t-shirt. With a smirk, you say, "Oh! I see you dressed up for our date. We must be going to a nice restaurant!"

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, they were both eaten by a killer whale.

A boy and his friends are talking trash about the principal, and the principal is standing right around the corner listening.

Terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return with sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

Two animal rights activists were protecting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protestors to death.

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!

Non-profit Tax ID # 203478467